tinanong niya uli aq for my career plans. may concrete na sagot naman na talaga ko eh, matagal na, kaya lang, di ko masabi kasi gusto ko muna maging fully competent to that field. butas kasi ng karayong para lang makapasok at makatagal dun. money’s not an issue, i just want to do what makes me happy. & its within the scope of our profession plus it tackles the area of my interest. ohh if im only that brilliant!
March 2011
54 posts
dear a,
for sure you’re not that busy right now. maybe you’re online. that makes me miss you bigtime right now. but i need to control myself. happy you know!;)
gusto ko na talaga makilala kung sino ung katabi ko. kasi kahit sa library nagkakataan na magkalapit parin kami ng inuupuan. saka may handout xa na gusto ko:p
bago ko pumasok sa school angganda ng pagbati ng nanay ko. Dadating na raw ang “siya”. tas pagbaba q ng lrt nasira ang backpack ko. saya:/
that feeling that you’re doing something for someone not because you want something in return but because it makes you happy knowing that your efforts made someone smile.
RF: sa totoo lang mas nayayabangan ako sa mga taong nagsasabing di sila nag-aaral o di sila naka-aral for some unreasonable reasons. para kasing simpleng pagyayabang yun na pag magandang grade nakuha nila eh di na nila kailangan magEffort. pero sa totoo lang, alas dos palang gising na o pa sila para lang magreview.
minsan hindi ko masukat kung hanggang saan ang nararapat. Kung mas pipigilan ko ang sarili ko o magpapaka-normal ako kung saan malaya kong magagawa ang mga bagay na kinocontrol ko.
uuwi na sana ko agad ng biglang may kinwento si atty. jack na nagpagising skn. nung nagrereview daw xa sa cpa board. napakaclumsy daw nia kaya sinulat nia sa calcu nia using liquid paper ang word na TANGA. dahil dun lagi xang nareremind na mag-ingat & lalong pagbutihin ang ginagawa nia. nung nag-aaral naman xa for bar exam, bigla nalang daw xang magwawala at itatapon nia ung mga libro nia kasi may nadiscover xang mali sa ginagawa nia kaya tuwang tuwa xa.
testing if i this mobile emailing service works:)
san ka ba galing? pinapasikip mo ang dibdib ko kasi ang hirap huminga. di ako makakaen kasi wala ako malasahan. tumutulo ang mga luha ko kapag masyadong maraming sipon. nawawala ako sa katinuan kasi bigla ka nalang mag-iingay dyan. hindi ba pwede lumayas ka na sa buhay ko? mahilig pa man din ako sa ice cream at chocolate. at nagiging corny ako dahil seo.
OMG. what have i done?

long before, a young girl was suffering from a broken heart. it was from a boy whom she loved so much that they need to part ways because he found someone else. it was a long roller coaster affair that she didn’t imagine would end up like that. thats why after that break up, she became suicidal. but luckily, one of his closest friend did everything just to help her mend her heart. the girl became happy as someone was always there to the rescue, always by her side to make her smile and not feel alone and make her feel loved. this hero loves her soooooo much that even though he knows that she’s still havent moved on, he accepted her and tried his very best so that the girl can love him. and so, days pass, they had to do some school stuff and everything. the girl was not always in right mind. she want to do this and that. become busy. but ofcourse that hero was always there. one day, the boy came. not to hook up again but somehow to make things a lil bit okey. even though months have passed after the break up, the girl’s heart belongs to this boy who hurted her. she didnt notice that since she entertained the hero, despite all the words that its okey to him and everything, she has been hurting him so badly. she sometimes left her so that she can satisfy her curiosity to the activities of the boy. though the girl was trying to make the hero as her priority cause she really doesnt want to hurt him, the special feelings just wont go away and the hero was always secretly hurt. and so after a series of unintentionally breaking the hero’s heart despite all the kindness and love he have gave her, the girl tried to distance herself from the hero. she thinks that she doesnt deserve the hero because its always this boy. it made the hero sad. days passed, it was unusual for the girl for the hero’s absence. though she loves him, in a different way, his company and the hero’s presence was missed by the girl. she suddenly realized that she actually loved him more than the boy. she was just used to to the feeling that she wasnt able to realize whom she trully loves. the pain she felt from the boy’s loss doubled in terms of the hero. and so the end of the term is nearing. luckily, they’re seatmates. one hot day. the hero drew something. and then the girl wrote on that paper. after a while, they had a serious talk. everything was revealed. the hero told the girl how much she’ve hurted her. it was painful to the girl to read those words. they were chatting on a notebook. actually, the diary of the girl that until now the girl possesses. but too late. the hero found someone else. and the girl was left inlove with the hero.
this is the story i want to tell someone but im hesitating cause i dont want to spoil the moment. no matter how hard we try not to hurt someone, we unintentionally and unknowingly hurt them. they dont tell us cause they love us. and whats worse was we only realize that we really love them when they left and we can never have them again in our life. plus they actually found someone who equally love them. i hope this wont happen again. cause shattering someone’s heart is very painful especially if all they did was to love you.
ngaun lang aq naiyak sa kilig ng makita ko un. wahahahahahaha. tagal ko rin to hinintay. and boom! so dami dami! galore.

sige last na talaga to, naexcite kasi ako magtype. kastress kasi ang buong araw na to. kanina pa ako type ng type. kung ano ano na ginagawa ko. di ako mapakali. may dahilan kasi. natural na nalulungkot tayo kaya lang, kapag ako, nagsimula ng umiyak, eh iba na un. kaninang umaga, pagkatapos ko maligo, at nagbibihis na aq papuntang school, talagang naiiyak na talaga ako. family problem. usually naman kaya kong pigilan ang sarili ko. pero eto, matagal ko nang pinapalampas. pero kasi, diba may hanggangan din naman ang bawat tao. hindi ko na kasi talaga kaya. stressed na nga ako dinadagdagan pa nila. i’ve never cursed that person in my head like that. galit na galit talaga ako. to a point na naiiyak na ako. actually tumulo naman na mga luha ko, weird thing about me kasi, lagi ako nahahatching pag naiiyak ako kaya lang, pero eto talagang hirap ako pigilan. eto ung tipo ng iyak ko na kayang tumagal ng 3 hours. angtindi tindi kasi ng sakit, wala pa ako masabihan. angbigat bigat na sa puso ko. yung tipong nung mabilis na si manong jeep at nasa intersection na, winish ko nalang na sakin tumama para matapos na tutal ano pang silbi ng life? lolwhut? hahaha. ano ba yan, nawala kasi ang momentum q, biglang nagpop ung friend ko at nawala ang mood ko. ohh well, sige saka na nga lang. buong araw ko na rin to iniiyakan. tama na. bumalik nalang tayo sa mga derivatives at abnormal spoilages. hahaha. namiss ko bigla eh.

few weeks ago, nakita ko si paranoia. paranoia ang code ko para sa crush ko nung 2nd or 3rd at gang 4th year at 5th yr ata. natawa nalang ako kasi naalala q kung gano ko ka-pathetic sa kanya dati. well, may positive effect kasi na naging crush ko sya. hmmm, basta naexplain q na to kay B dati. malabo kasi siguro kung ieexplain q, pero parang ganto kasi un, tinry ko xa nalang magustuhan q kasi atleast mas tahimik buhay q. ung tipong alam mong never magiging kayo kasi alam mo naman na una, nung time na un, may shota sya at pangalawa, alam ko naman na di nia ako magugustuhan. atleast walang chance magiging kayo at puro kv lang mabibigay nia twing magkikita kami. andaming nakakatawang bagay ang nangyari nung college that involves paranoia. paranoia pala tawag ko sa kanya kasi, una napaparaoid aq pag anjan xa, at pangalawa, basta galing un sa isang psychological study eh. nakakatuwa lang kasi dati, twing nakikita ko sya, super lakas lagi ng tibok ng puso ko. lagi nalang aq nagkakamali at kadalasan nakaka-to aq sa kanya. may instance pa nga nun, asa canteen kami kumakaen, malayo naman xa at xempre aq lang nakaka-alam na xa si paranoia. eh may nakakatawang sinabi si M na napabuga kami ni B habang sabay kami umiinom. nakita nia un alam q. good thing nakatalikod mga kasama ko at ako lang nakakita sa kanya. naalala q pa dati, lumabas aq ng pinto, eh padaan pala xa, muntik na xang tamaan ng pinto. buti nalang talaga, kahit di kami classmates dati, eh halos padaan daan xa kung san. panghapon din xa nun. ayun. anyway, ang point ko sa post na ito ay wala na ang epek sakin ni paranoia. actually binati nia aq nung makita q xa. kung nuon to, for sure 1 week na akong di nakatulog. pero nung araw na un, wala lang, edi ayos, gv nakakita ko ng kakilala. ayun. hahaha. pero pinag-effortan q magtype ng sandamakmak. hahaha. naku, napakarami ko kasing sinikretong kwento ukol kay paranoia na di ko kinwento kanino man. siguro kung hanggang ngaun, sya parin ang gusto ko, siguro mas tahimik ang buhay ko. kaya lang, lol. ohh well,. sige babalik na nga aq sa ginagawa ko. magandang gabi!^^,
i really really really miss you bigtime! kung alam mo lang. anghirap naman kasi pigilan ang sarili eh. yan tuloy nagHope na naman ako na makita kitang online, pero lagi nalang tayo nagkakasalisi. nalulungkot kasi ako eh. lalo tuloy kita namimiss. sana maalala mo naman ako. anghirap hirap na kasi eh. hinahanap hanap ka ng lahat ng external and internal body parts ko.
Ben Rector - Loving You Is Easy

last night, i wasn’t able to sleep early. i panicked all night and morning cause i realized that my St. Jude bracelet was lost. i searched, think, try to remember and panic, everything, i cant find it. i got frustrated and i almost cried. i know its just a material thing but that stuff is more important to me than a cellphone. if i were to choose among my stuffs which one could go lost, this one surely would equalize my laptop, im afraid they might scold me if i lost my laptop, but if we’re rich, this will surely be the least thing i want to be lost. and so i cant find it. this is how i suspect how things get complicated. tuesday morning, as i leave home, i noticed that my favorite white watch is lost but because i was running late i decided to just wear my brown watch and decided to take the lrt. its always crazy and choatic out there competing with barbarian working gurls. so when i was standing on the platform waiting for the train to come, i decided to make my St. Jude bracelet safe. i was wearing it on my right hand and i pulled it off and put it inside my right pocket which is somehow jammed packed cause my 2 cellphones and rosary is there. i felt relieved after i did that cause im always worried that my bracelet would broke off if i let it worn during that time. and so as i arrived at my station, i weirdly cant get my card off the entry point and luckily, there’s still newspaper and so i bent to get one. i rushed to school and arrived late. as i settle down after i arrived at my seat, i tried to feel if my bracelet is still. whenever its not in my hand, i usually paranoid that it would get lost so i usually check it on my pocket. as i checked it, i seem not to find it. but because i think my pocket is full of stuff, i first think that it might be hidden deep down. but that time i began to worry. later, i tried to search it again but i still cant find it, so i said to myself, maybe when i get home, i would be able to see it, i even suspected if i was able to bring it. it was already late night when i get home. it was a long day at school and too many stuff happen that i almost forgot about my bracelet. so come evening when i’m changing clothes, i noticed that something is weird among my stuff. i went to do my usual stuff and next day i didnt go to school cause i sit in enough. wednesday evening, as i was preparing my thursday handouts and stuff, i noticed that my white watch was there. but my St. Jude bracelet wasn’t. i searched every corner and every where it would be capable of occupying. but no trace. i even asked my mom where did she found my watch and searched that place. i even suspected, is there a bermuda triangle inside my room? its 2:30am and i decided that its so late that i need to go to sleep for school. im not calm, i cant even sleep. i want to cry. i weeped a little. i decided to finish the movie “a beautiful mind” but i wasnt able to do so cause they’re telling me its late so, 25% left to completion, i turned off my laptop. but still,. as i lie down, i was thinking about my lost bracelet. the first time i saw it on G’s hand after i prayed thoroughly that God would let me graduate during our second time to go to St. Jude, i automatically fell inlove with its beauty and i said to myself, i want one! i’ll buy that for sure. i asked G on where she bought it and so i bought one. i was really happy having it. all my friends who are very dear to my heart has one. maybe, we’re 15 who has it. the same exact St. Jude bracelet. i always wear it or i always bring it whenever i go out. it has a deep special meaning to me. it makes me feel safe and happy whenever i see it. it reminds me of my friends and our devotion to St. Jude. i dont feel alone whenever i see it. it is my constant reminder that He’s with me and so as my friends. it signifies our hope for our one dreams. its my most special material thing. its like my friend whose always there wherever i go. i dunno what else to describe it. but looking back, few days ago, maybe monday, or whatever day, i was thinking, what if it get lost? what would i do, or if someone offers me maybe 1 million for it, will i give it? or i imagined it framed as i grew older. i imagined a future with my bracelet. maybe around 3am i was still awake. i was thinking if i’ll just continue studying and go to school without sleep or sleep. but i slept. and surprisingly, they didnt woke me off. my class is 8am and i woke up 8:45am. sh!t im soooo damn late. i rushed for p2. its the first time i didn’t wore my St. Jude bracelet. i tried to calm myself and i just said to myself, after the boards, i would buy one. im afraid to buy another cause i bought one whose bigger before when i thought i lost my original one, and i experienced a second something. and so, i think i wont buy one for the meantime. we’ve been together for a year. it has been with me during my happy and difficult times. its my smile maker. after i became a better person in May, i’ll surely buy one. but ofcourse if someone would buy me a replacement now, i would surely love it. and i will be more careful. but, im still hoping that soon enough, my beloved St. Jude bracelet and i will meet again. please come back! thank you for reading and please, pray that we could meet again. i hope you understand why it means a lot to me. God Bless!^^,

all day, i was trying to remember what i’ve dreamt last night that made my heart beat so fast as i woke up. i usually sleep more when i wake up that i became more late for school, but this morning, that dream, made me feel different. i was really nervous. its officially been a month since things collided, but that collusion is a positive collusion. thanks to a friend’s story, i’ve learned something that accepted it whole heartedly. everything has been easier. and so one day, at some lil urge inside my brain cells, i decided to write a letter. my as of the moment letter that clearly depicts my current feelings towards things and from past events. i even put it inside an envelope hoping that someday i would have the courage to give it to the designated people. and in my dream this night, i dunno but i happily decided to give it. i remember the scene where i was on the other side of the wall as i look at the person reading it and became nervous with how will things turn out. i know i’ve put my heart in that letter. and at the moment i was going to get a feedback, i woke up. lol. great wake up call. i know its God’s message to me that someday i would be strong enough to share that letter and see for real what things really is. for the meantime, lets just be happy and see whats there. right?
She Will Be Loved (acoustic)- Maroon 5
natatawa ko sa sarili ko, ilang linggo ko na rin gamit tong new cp q. pero ngaun ko lang namamaximize. grabe ang hirap hirap magtxt sa qwert cellphones gamit ang napakalaki kong mga daliri. para kong nanay ko magtext. hahaha. bagal na bagal tuloy sila sa reply ko. hahahaha
kakatuwa. mapapatay ata nila aq sa susunod kong gagawin. but this is a matter of time. pagtapos nitong napakalaking joke na to, eh magpapakabuti na aq. lol. dont live beyond your means daw. naku, kailangan ko na talagang tumanggap ng mga dati kong gngwa. diet na nga. super sayan mode pa. lol. nakakamiss na si valix at roque!

oh my! sabi q na mauubos un!!! wahuhuhuhu! oh well, aus lang, pero parang hindi. hahaha. 50% din sana ang reduction sa cost! pero ayos lang, may bukas pa! ung isa nalang dapat di ko kalimutan! naman! saka masaya naman maxado ang araw nato. waaahahahaha. so many happy surprises. lol. tas pati tumblr may super first time very good news sakin. hai. sarap mabuhay. condo nalang kulang. wahahhaa^__________________________________^

si utoy daw?
dont let this big opp pass! waiting doesnt help this time. dont think! have the courage. who cares if its too risky?
From the moment that i wake up
all i think about is you
i can’t fight it, its the truth
Your the sun on a cloudy day,
your the healer of my pain
And i won’t let you go away,
your a god sent on my brain
And theres nothing left to prove.. You got me
Yes you do, Cause you got me Yeah its true
Theres something about you..

malapit na kasi magHoly week. eh nung panahong uso pa ipalabas ang mga pelikula niya tulad ng Insiang ko siya nakilala. i wonder how much more he can contribute to our film industry during this time. try to watch his movies! galing galing!
kung kelan naman may importante kang text na iniintay, dun pa nagloloko ang globe at cellphone mo. wahhh! ohh please!
RANDOM FACT: few minutes ago, naramdaman ko ang isa sa pinakamasarap na pag-iinat after ng isang nakakapagod na gawain, hahahaha. epekto na ata to ng ice cream diet.

siguro nga late reaction na pero ngayon lang kasi q nagnet kaya magrereact narin ako. buti naman buhay si mara. pati kasi mga reviewer namin esp. ang roque bros. eh nagbigay ng 1 minutong katahimikan para sa pagkamatay ni mara. grabe. nakakatawa lang kasi pati ung mga di mo inaasahang nanunuod ng mara clara eh nanunuod pala. pati ung video ni pam napanuod din nila. nakakatawa lang, trending topic xa sa cpar. hahaha. sayang nga lang, gusto ko sana masaksihan mga rxn ng mga tao d2 sa tumblr kaya lang di ko pa tapos ginagawa ko. anyway, sana ipakita na kung sino si utoy. nakakamiss ang mga moments nila ni christian.

nakakatuwa, successful naman ang operasyon kanina sa fatima. masakit, kadiri pero si dok na kamukha ni erwin tulfo ay mabaet naman. show-off nga lang maxado sa napaka-modern facility nila na pinapapanuod pa talaga sakin mga ginagawa nila eh sa totoo lang keber ako at ayoko na makita ang loob ng katawan ko. kaya siguro hindi ako natuloy magdoktor at napunta ko sa mundo ng pagtutuos. hehe. nakakatuwa pala ung african american na guy nurse, ung enthusiasm nia matuto nakikita mo. at hindi ko malilimutan si ateng inalalayan ako all through out. naiyak pa xa nung bandang huli. so ngayon mag-iingat na ako. medyo dangerous ang stage na to, 5 araw ko rin pag-titiisan maglagay ng gamot. siguro mga 2 months bago ko maging normal uli. di tuloy ako pede sa wild at sa swimming pool. oh well, lesson learned, hahaha. ano nga ba? masaya din pala magpunta sa ospital. bukod kasi sa bangko, ayoko sa ospital. ayun. bawal magkasakit!

Pierre, OFCOURSE, everybody’s fave, is just so adorable. angbata bata niya palang pero parang napakaMature in a very cute way na niya kumilos. i really cant help rooting for his win.
next to pierre is alex. actually, few months ago, as i was lurking the cable channel, i saw alex. he looks so messy like in cartoons, i cant remember what cartoon is it, maybe the rugrats but i really like alex. bad thing, he was out tonight.
and my last faves are jack and cassidy. jack’s really reminds me of atyy. jack and jack black. and cassidy, she reminds me of myself. lol.
anyway, i dont like lucy. dessert queen my face. plus isabella and sofia. i dunno. i just dont like them.
maybe, if this is in primetime, it would definitely complete with the ratings of mara clara. lol. naisingit talaga. anyway, if i could repeat my life, i wanna be part of this show. so brilliant and talented lil kiddo chefs.
supeeeeeeerrr kv!!!!! ohh my, kahapon pa pala niya un siningle out. waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhahahahahaha. kv to d highest level^^,